Final Photo booth Poster for Process and Skill
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Hey Guys, So I'm Totally Embarrassed, OK?
So look, don’t be mad, ok? See, here’s the thing, I kind of jumped off a building. I know, I know, it’s pretty insane, so I’ll give you a minute to take it in. How does a dude with an amazing girlfriend, a ton of ridiculously awesome buddies, and prospects galore end up flying over the edge? Lean in, and I’ll tell you the secret: I let myself believe I was utterly, irredeemably alone….
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Well doesn’t @JULIA_HOLTER have a rather lovely voice at @BlackCatDc tonight (Taken with Instagram at Black Cat)
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The Room I Never Enter....
When Alison ran away, she had my copy of the Lorax tucked precariously under her arm. I think of it sometimes, rattling in those cheap hotel rooms, as the tragic dance of statutory rape unfolded over and over. She was 15, he was 18, and their plan was to shack their way to California before her father — the rigid marine — could track their progress.
She was my high school crush of the highest order — whip-smart, sarcastic, sexy, and darkly mannered enough to give steam to my most poetic French-lit fantasies. She was also supposed to be my Homecoming date, but for those few weeks at least, she was the province of something very different than my unending affection.
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We'll keep our veins tangled like a pair of mic cables...
Flavorpill was family; it was life. From the day I started, it became as tied to my identity as my name, my hometown, and everything I learned growing up. It was my education, my rite of passage. It was what and who I was. My best friends were my co-workers, my job (no matter how much I complained) was amazing, and it was there, in those days, that New York really opened up — enormous and malevolent like a God of unquenchable atoms. High-cred, low-pay, big respect. We were cultural warriors — offbeat NY’s upper elite. Every door was open, and every guest list was ours. 2,000 person parties at the Museum of Natural History, Kanye West collabs, David Byrne meet-ups in the office, and everything in between.
I worked there for almost 5 years and the day they laid me off was the worst of my life (we drank till sickness, and Rachel held back my hair). More than that, it was the day my grand ascent ended. My move, my next job, MOG, were certainly professional progressions, but you can chart the larger spiritual decline from the moment Mark and Sascha called me into their office.
Of course, I didn’t leave without making a final mark. I sent the following, epic email — it would later represent my farewell to New York, my home, the person I was, and the incredible life I once led…
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Illumntr - Tangled with Bear
Brooklynite Bryn Austin Bellomy writes:
Hi Mark,
We have an LP set to come out later this year, which will be entitled “Soul Sister,” or maybe “Soul Sister, pt. 1,” depending on how much of the album’s story we’re able to cram into each song. I, for one, am thinking that there’s a strong case to be made for the latter — or maybe for scrapping the album idea and getting someone to make an old-school RPG about it instead.
Essentially, this thing follows the tale of a lonely protagonist who discovers that he was originally to have a twin sister; however, she died at some point during the pregnancy, leaving him the only child of his parents’ marriage.
For the first 20-some-odd years of his life, our protagonist is none the wiser, unaware entirely of the existence (anti-existence?) of this hypothetical female twin — unaware except for faint, ephemeral intuitions and dreams that he, a relatively mathematical and logical creature, has little trouble dismissing.
“Gulf Hymn,” the song that you were so kind as to present to the world this past January, falls right at the crucial point in the story during which the two siblings first make real contact across the boundary between the living and the dead. The protagonist accuses his sister of having fled the life that they had decided to embark upon together, and in so doing, of abandoning him to the various hardships that he now has to endure alone.
Our new single, “Tangled With Bear,” picks up shortly thereafter. Having heard out the protagonist’s accusations, the sister-ghost explains why she chose to flee before fully incarnating. I don’t want to give too much away just yet, but I’ll say this much: Tangled With Bear tells the tale of the epic battle between the protagonist and an angry, violent soul he has been chasing through many lifetimes — and who happens to be precisely the soul that the protagonist’s sister was so afraid to confront yet again.
Despite being the original originator of all of this madness, it’s sometimes very difficult for me to listen to — Gulf Hymn and Tangled With Bear in particular. That is to say that there’s a thread of painful truth running through all of it, although I’ve projected it deep into the realm of the fantastic, perhaps to make it easier to play and sing and work with. It’s hard to say why we feel compelled to write about the things that we can’t help but write about, especially when they seem to dig at uncomfortable places in our minds that we otherwise might’ve had a lot less trouble ignoring.
On the bright side, the record is set to end fairly well for the good guys, seeing the protagonist travel all the way to the moon in search of his sister’s ghost (must be quite a view from up there). But we’ll get there when we get there, I suppose.
Best wishes,
bryn // illumntr
Read more Letters to YVYNYL
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