Youtube finally decided to work and actually let me upload this.
This was my latest film project for my cousin’s wedding photography company.
I think it turned out super adorable.
But i’ve seriously looked at it so much, i am sick of it.
so tell me what you think!
As weird and out there as this may sound, I’d love for this to be the song that’s played at my funeral.
Just a thought.
I am currently being a nerd and playing on Pottermore and enjoying all the shit that goes on in J.K. Rowling’s head.
Guess what??
I just got a call from the head of the organization I made my last video for, and someone who saw it contacted him and wants to show it at an event they’re having in August. This is huge. I’m so excited right now. People like something I made, and want to use it for a big event. This is crazy. I need to get some business cards made.
Sometimes, you need to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself of who you are and who you want to be.
LET’S BE FRIENDS!
I’m serious! In my life there are very few people that I have things in common with, and even fewer people that I consider to be close friends. My shyness tends to come across as rudeness, but I promise I’m actually nice! So let’s chat! Let’s be pals! I wanna send you little letters and presents on your birthday~!
Hello Ashley! I hope you’re doing well. More than that, I hope you are happy. Are you? (Please say yes.) I hope that you have become a stronger, more trusting individual, and I hope that you have learned to let your guard down (even just a little bit). I hope you are living more openly, and I hope that you aren’t afraid of what everyone might think (because really, it’s none of your business what people think of you).
Some Advice:
Take chances! Don’t give up, no matter how much you want to. Go outside your comfort zone. Laugh more. And, stop worrying! You’re stronger than you think you are, and you deserve more than you think you do.
Love Always,
Ashley
i’m in a trend right now where the only thing to do for entertainment is meet friends and ingest things.
i really really need to stop that.
so i am trying to make a month long goal for myself.
and we’ll see how it goes.
this is my blog, so i am going to write down everything i eat every day.
and sorry if that bothers you, scroll on past.
but i want to be in better health for my birthday and christmas.
i’ve done this before and it really does help because you stop eating the crazy things you do when you aren’t thinking about it.
i’m taking my vitamins and eating right, and i’m going to try to get back into the swing of exercising daily.
that’s the hardest part.
i’ve gotten so lazy…
so with that, i’m sorry if this blog turns into something you don’t like to read.
if it’s going good at the end of the month (December 10th) then i’m going to keep it up.
and i think by doing this, i will have more energy and my skin will be more healthy as well.
so here is to better living :)
I’ve been doing some research on barefoot running, running in Vibram shoes, and the “primitive” stride style that is apparently the best way to prevent running injury, but a sort of behavior that is trained out of us by the supportive style of shoes we wear as modern humans. (You can read more here on the NY Times if you’re interested; thanks to my pal Amy for tweeting this just when I needed it!) I have bad (read: awful) knees, and they start to complain after distances of about 5 kilometers — which, for a while, has been fine. But as I want to get into participating in races and possibly working my way up to more significant distances, the knee problem becomes more of a noticeable issue.
Today, I decided to go for a run and adjust my stride and work on my form and stop heel-stomping, just to see if I could give some relief to my twingey, creaky joints and keep moving longer and further. I had no real goal in mind other than to run for half an hour straight.
At first, catching my strides on the balls of my feet and only letting my heels brush the ground was an awkward adjustment. I felt like I was bouncing and prancing instead of running. My shoes, of course, are designed for me to roll on the back of my heels, so that had another impact — I just and to work around the way my brain is trained to run, and the way my shoes wanted me to run. When I finally hit the right groove, though, I was right there, and I couldn’t return to my old stride if I wanted to.
I kept moving. I ran through the suburbs of Bruce and the low, orange houses that remind me of the American midwest. I ran along the sidewalk that runs in the middle of two apartment buildings and I passed the laundry of the tenants, all strung out on the railings of their porches. I ran through the little parks in the middle of the neighborhoods and up the hills and through the stop signs and roundabouts and onto a bike path. I ran when the path intersected the road, and on instinct this time, I looked right first and then left; Australia’s way of ingraining itself in my habits. I ran and I ran and I ran and my breathing was even and easy and I just kept running until the bike path was surrounded by bush.
I turned a corner in the path and and right in front of me in a field of gum trees and shrubby grass stood ten kangaroos, ears twitching. Chewing. The kangaroo stance. I’ve become pretty familiar with seeing kangaroos at dawn and dusk, but to see them in the middle of the afternoon is rare. It was special enough to stop me. I walked into the group and they all looked warily at me, the same way deer stand still and observe and buzz and wait. They were stoney and twitching and I stood there, in the middle of the group, watching them. No camera, no phone, no people, no way to brand this moment and reduce it to a snapshot. It was mine, perfectly and completely mine, there in the middle of the field, alone with the kangaroos. For one of the first times in Australia, I let the moment just happen. I had no way of recording it for some sort of album or book or blog and I was fully present. I let my breathing slow.
I stepped on the wrong twig and the entire mob bounced away.
And then, well, I kept running. I ran back down to the path and I ran and I ran and I ran.
When I was finally spent, I tried to stand still under the bright open blue of the sky but the wind was so strong it pushed me forward, nudged me into a stumbling walk. I started laughing. I started laughing the way I’ve sometimes started crying — choked and heaving and inexplicable and loud; my lungs acted without me knowing why and I just laughed. I was so overwhelmed with happiness. I couldn’t shut down and stop laughing until my body had spent its endorphin crack, I just had to ride the moment the same way you wait for sobs to stop rolling through your body. I had to let the overflow of happiness spill.
I’ve never completed a run that distance without feeling complete defeated by the time I’m finished. I’ve never stopped running after half an hour without wanting to collapse on the pavement. I’ve never felt like I was capable of moving for that amount of time and then doubling it, tripling it. But today I felt capable. I felt like I could have moved until the sun went down. The summer sky opened wide and blue and the wind pushed me forward and I kept moving, moving, moving.
It may be something personal and something I cannot describe, but this afternoon in Canberra when I went for a run will be one of the moments I remember in saturated color. The kangaroos on the hill and the laughter and the wind. These moments are Australia to me. This is my experience. The days I finally stop underestimating myself.
